Cachie: Were you all big Jurassic Park fans before??
Gaby: I am! I love the first and second films.
Jon: I wouldn’t call myself a big fan, but I really liked the first one and the world it attempted to create.
Matthew: I like three the most. I’m not crazy about the first one and not a fan of Lost World.
Cachie: WHOA. WHAT?
Gaby: I pretend the third doesn’t exist. It was so bad. Mind you–I never read the books.
Cachie: Matt…you are literally the only person I have ever met that liked the third one. I’ve never read the books either but I love all the movies.
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Matthew: Yep. I like three the most. It makes no presumptions about being anything more than a fun monster B movie. I actually spoke a little bit on the first one with the Young Folks retrospective.
Jon: Yeah, not a fan of the third one.
Cachie: A lot of people pretend the third one doesn’t exist. But I’m not one of them. I enjoy it a lot.
Matthew: The director of Jurassic World pretended it didn’t exist. Same with Lost World.
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Jon: Although, I do love this scene in the third one:
Now those are animatronics I can get behind.
Cachie: To me, it doesn’t measure up to one and two (or even four now), but I still like it!
Matthew: That’s another problem I had with the movie. He pulled a Bryan Singer and ignored sequels he didn’t like. Regardless, they’re part of the canon and can’t be ignored.
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Cachie: I kind of get mad when people say how awful they think the third one is. LOL. It’s a sensitive topic. I like that it was like an ode to the first one though. So many Easter eggs that it made it so much fun for the movie fans.
Gaby: Sorry…I only saw it twice and was so disappointed because I grew up watching JP and TLW every other day. So my distaste for three is strong.
Cachie: NO! GABY GIVE IT ANOTHER CHANCE!
Gaby: However–I do get why people don’t like TLW, but I still like it anyway. It’s one of those things…
Matthew: Some of the nods I liked and some of them I didn’t. It hit so many of the similar story beats and plot elements that at points it felt more like a remake than a sequel.
Jon: The problem with all the sequels is the underdeveloped characters. I would consider Jurassic World a reboot.
Cachie: Nah, to me it’s definitely a sequel, but obviously like two and three didn’t even happen.
Matthew: I got a reboot vibe, but they make so many references and callbacks it’s tough to do so.
Gaby: Same. I would say JW was like a reboot if we didn’t have that long scene in the old park.
Cachie: God, I loved that scene!
Jon: They always go back to the old park, I feel. Even when they’re on a different island. It’s like a nod to them never learning their lesson in the first place.
Cachie: LOLOL.
Gaby: Right? Even if they were, I don’t understand why they didn’t clear it out?
Cachie: Did you learn nothing?! LOL. Stupid money hungry humans. UGH.
Gaby: Well, that brings us to the anti-corporate and anti-militarization topics in the film…
Matthew: I’m just amazed they got the jeep running given it’s been twenty-two years and the Rex somehow didn’t find them in between trying to kickstart it.
Cachie: LMFAO. MAN. STOP. GET OUT OF MY HEAD. That’s exactly what I thought.
Matthew: I hated the anti-militarization subplot of the film. It felt right out of an early 1990s corny action film. D’Onofrio was right out of a Warmonger cartoon. I thought after Avatar we were going to see the end of generic evil military men. Guess I was wrong…
Jon: It always comes back to corporate greed, and Claire was part of that machine.
Cachie: Yep.
Jon: Up until half way when she realized they have feelings too.
Cachie: I would’ve been totally cool with Claire getting eaten…ALSO…HOW CAN CLAIRE OUTRUN A T-REX. WTF?
Jon: And that her sister would be pissed if her kids died.
Matthew: She outran it in high heels!
Jon: I LOVE THAT SCENE.
Cachie: LMAO. It should’ve been an ad for those shoes.
Jon: That squashed any inklings I might have had about the film being sexist.
Cachie: “So comfortable you can outrun a T-REX and not get one blister!” And they say Disney sets unbelievable standards. PFFT.
Matthew: Given the obnoxious product placement scattered throughout, I’m surprised it wasn’t an ad.
Jon: She did everything in high heels, and she was about to keep up with the men.
Gaby: She did make it a point that she was going to deal with this situation, even with her heels on. I didn’t find the film as sexist as lot of buzz made it out to be. I mean I think Claire just suffers from being underdeveloped, but it wasn’t anything offensively bad.
Matthew: I didn’t find it sexist either. I just found the writing and characterization lazy or nonexistent at points.
Jon: I agree, most of the characters were very underdeveloped. Then again, most of them were just dino fodder anyway.
Cachie: I think you guys are reading way too into a movie about dinosaurs. LOL.
Gaby: When the dinosaurs are more developed than the characters…
Cachie: LOL. True dat.
Matthew: Aside from Pratt, the only likeable character I found was Jake Johnson.
Cachie: But I really loved the little kid. ❤ SO MUCH LIKE TIMMY!
Gaby: Jake Johnson was great and the right kind of comic relief.
Jon: He added to the cheesiness.
Cachie: I liked his character a lot.
Jon: Which wasn’t a bad thing since this film was so full of it, it could have its own dairy category.
Cachie: Damn Jon, keep it coming with those dairy jokes! LOL.
Matthew: It’s basically Jaws 3 with a budget. It has the cheesiness of the blockbuster Roger Corman never got to make.
Jon: Maybe the cheesiness contributed to the characters seeming so constipated.
Gaby: LOL.
Cachie: LOLOL.
Click NEXT to read what we think might happen in the sequel.
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