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A subjective history of the Album of the Year Grammy, in reverse.
By Ryan Maffei
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[tps_title]2015 -2000[/tps_title]
2015 — Beck beats Beyoncé (absolutely ridiculous), Pharrell (probably somewhat ridiculous), Sam Smith and Ed Sheeran (well).
Verdict: RIDICULOUS
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2014 — Daft Punk beats Kendrick (ridiculous), Red (ridiculous), Macklemore (arguably ridiculous) and Sara Bareilles (probably not ridiculous but closer than you think)
Verdict: SEMI-RIDICULOUS
2013 — Mumford and Sums beats Black Keys (who gives a f*ck), fun. (yay!), Jack White (meh) and Frank Ocean (album was a touch airy but hold on a second son)
Verdict: RIDICULOUS AT NOMINATION STAGE
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2012 — Adele beats Foo Fighters (good for her), Lady Gaga (her weakest so eh), Bruno Mars (they’re kind of in the same league) and Rihanna (possibly ridiculous)
Verdict: INOFFENSIVE
2011 — Arcade Fire beats Eminem (why not), Lady Antebellum (fair enough), Teenage Dream (against which they win the substance but not pizazz battle) and Fame Monster (now wait just a minute)
Verdict: NOMS RACIST, WIN (<— pun) SUBTLY SEXIST BUT NOT NECESSARILY RIDICULOUS
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2010 — T-Swift beats Sasha Fierce (fair), Black Eyed Peas (maybe?), Gaga #1 (maybe) and the GrooGrux King (thank God)
Verdict: TRACE ANTI-POP/ANTI-BLACK BUT OTHERWISE ACCEPTABLE
2009 — Plant/Krauss beats Coldplay (heh), Ne-Yo (bah), Radiohead (double heh), and Lil Wayne (f*ck you)
Verdict: DAD-FOLK
2008 — Hancock beats Foo Fighters (duh), four-disc Vince Gill (uh), Back to Black (wuh?), Graduation (guh)
Verdict: SAFE AS HOUSES
2007 — Dixie Chicks beats Gnarls Barkley (that’s okay), John Mayer (that’s well beyond okay), Red Hot Chili Peppers (that’s the okayest yet), FutureSex/LoveSounds (Justin himself would probably concede okayness)
Verdict: ULTRAMEGA OK
2006 — U2 beats Mariah (I dunno, man), McCartney (in a rare decent showing), Gwen Stefani (I can’t imagine “Vertigo” being better than “Hollaback” but have heard neither in a decade) and Late goddamn Registration
Verdict: ONE DAY BONO WILL BE THE FIRST (ACTUALLY) IRISH PRESIDENT OF NARAS
2005 — Genius Loves Company beats American Idiot (good), Alicia Keys (well…), Usher (I mean…) and College Dropout (okay, come the f*ck on)
Verdict: PROBABLY OLD WHITE MEN
2004 — OutKast (!) beats Under Construction (close!), Evanescence (the opposite of close), Justified (pretty close) and Elephant (Jack White ca. respectability)
Verdict: GIMMICK + “HEY YA” = FLUKE SEMI-JUSTICE
2003 — Norah Jones in the throes of her moment beats Dixie Chicks (better), Eminem (better), Nelly (probably better), Bruce (in this case better!)
Verdict: SYMBOLICALLY DISGUSTING IN THIS PARTICULAR BUSH YEAR BUT HEY, WHO DOESN’T LIKE “DON’T KNOW WHY” (A: AS MANY PEOPLE THAT CAN’T NAME ANOTHER SONG ON THE RECORD)
2002 — T-Bone and company beat India.Arie (okay), renaissance Dylan (a record that satisfied the things the voters liked in O Brother better), Stankonia (come the f*ck on) and an actual great U2 album
Verdict: THE ALPHA BAND WAS REALLY GOOD
2001 — in an upset that jibes thematically with their career-long disposition Steely Dan beat Eminem, also good Radiohead, good Beck and marginally less good Paul Simon
Verdict: AMUSING
2000 — “Smooth” album beats “I Want it That Way” album (bullshit), “Goodbye Earl” album (bullshit), “Scrubs” album (bullshit) and whatever the hell was the hit on that bullshit Diana Krall album
Verdict: A DEPRESSING TIME
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